28 May 2010

Things I plan on doing that are "bad" for me. A Messy Poll!

(Photograph copyright 2010, all rights reserved.)

I keep hearing about all of the things in life that are going to kill us, and I'm really starting to wonder just how seriously to take them. Of course, whenever I say things like this, someone gets all indignant and tells me how horrible I am that I would do such things and how dare I even consider it....

So to hell with the lot. One day "sugar is poison", the next it's not. Coffee used to be "poison", but it turns out it's fine, too. Margarine instead of butter was Gospel for twenty years or so...until someone found out about polyunsaturated fats, trans-fats and all of the other nasties that margarine contains that will kill you. I'm bitter about that last one, by the way. I have always like butter better, and I was deprived for far too long.

What am I going to do then?

1. I'm going to eat the good stuff. That means things like pork belly, foie gras, lamb - all of the meat products. Whole eggs. Butter. I'm going to cook with it, bake with it and put it on my toast, just like I do now, for the rest of my life.

Dessert. I'm going to eat desserts. In all their sugary glory. That's what gyms are for, right?

2. I will NEVER eat things that health enthusiasts tell me I "have" to eat. There will never be soy or foodlike soy products in my house. NEVER. Weird, uncookable grains? No thanks. Brown rice? Yuck, tastes like dirt. Even yogurt. I never particularly liked the stuff. It tastes like milk gone bad...oh wait! It IS milk gone bad!

3. I'm never going to stop drinking. Wine is good. Red wine is better. There's nothing like a lovely bourbon to bring smiles (I recommend "Noah's Mill) to my life. Good Scotch. The next time someone accuses me of "alcoholism" because I had two glasses of wine with dinner, I might just smack them.

4. I quit smoking in my late 30s after smoking for 20 years. I did it only for the sake of my health, NOT because I didn't like it. When I hit my late 70s/early 80s, I'm going to take up smoking again. I LIKE smoking. Nonsmokers will never understand this. I'm all right with that.

I'm an addict, I admit it. A full decade after quitting, the cravings are still there. There are many times when I'd like to mug that teenager for his/her cigarettes, sneak into the alley and smoke'em all. The funny part of this is that whenever I say this to former smokers, they either remain silent (because they agree) or they loudly proclaim that they would NEVER..... But they never say they don't want to do just that.

5. I'm not giving up the sun. I can't do it. Don't get me wrong, I'm not a fan of lying around on beaches or lounge chairs, but I'm damned if I'm giving up the sun on my face and the Vitamin D I get from it. Screw supplements, I want the real thing. If you live in a place that has winter for more than six months out of the year, you understand me.

Let me go further. Sunscreen sucks ass. It makes me itch. It makes my skin do weird things. It smells funny. I'm allergic to some of them.

Yes, I'm a fair-skinned person with a few (not many) freckles and red hair. I don't really tan, and what I consider to be a tan (on me), most people snicker at. I'm not just fair, I'm fishbelly white. But I LIKE my freckles. I already have a wrinkle or two, but I'm going to be 47 this year. I've earned them.


Naturally, I don't plan on paying any attention to people who seem determined to suck all the fun out of life and preach at me to obey them in all things. I find the older I get, the less likely I am even to be polite to these folks. They're pretty obnoxious and the kind of nosiness they display is something I find really irritating.

I guess I really AM on the road to curmudgeonhood. Hmm. I'm ok with it, too.

So here's the poll:

What "bad" things are YOU not giving up?


  1. "What "bad" things are YOU not giving up?"

    Sadly, I've never liked most of the things that are supposed to be bad for you. Smoke stinks. I don't care if someone else smokes, as long as I don't have to smell it, that is, they are downwind of me. Alcohols tastes yucky to me, as does anything with coconut (except pie), another "deadly" food. And seafood, the type with legs, has just always seemed too gross to consume.

    I've never been a big fan of sitting in the sun. After years of running barefoot across melted asphalt as a kid, a round of heat exhaustion, and skin which - like yours I'll bet - is either porcelain white or fire engine red, I enjoy nice, comfortable air conditioning, provided it isn't too cold.

    I'm not giving up my car. You can't get anywhere around here without one, unless you have a fast bicycle and a death wish. I'm not giving up my soft drinks, no matter how much sugar is crammed into them. I also like my fast food, at least from certain providers (none of which have "arches" of any color.) And even when I was so poor, I didn't know if I could buy my next loaf of bread before payday, I have had a pet. Not that animals are bad for you (unless you're allergic), but they can create quite an expense.

  2. That's what I'm talking about!

    Let the record show that I'm not a fan of soda. It just isn't my preferred sugar fix. A Snickers bar once in a while is more my speed.

  3. I'm not giving up my diet coke. I know it's all chemical laced caffiene, But I like it. So what?

    Also, I nearly bought a pack of cigarettes the other day because I had such a vivid dream the night before of smoking, and the flavor lingered in my mouth like a tease. Fucking dreams. ;-)

    I don't smoke anymore because it affected my singing voice. In fact, when I woke up and realized that, I quit that day and never had a nic fit, until the other day when I woke up from that dream.

    I eat what tastes good and my body likes, in portions it can handle, and I'm ok with that. I enjoy "healthy" foods like whole grains and non-sugary cerals, but I also enjoy chocolate, the darker the better.

    They say that computer screens can be bad for you, and that looking at them for too long is a bad thing. Don't care. Didn't care when they said that about video games on the tv either. I'll watch whatever pretty flickering lights I like, tyvm.

    Like you, Messy, I'm not giving up my sun exposure. However, I'm convinced I'm part cat. When it's sunny outside, I want nothing more than to go find a sunbeam to nap in. =-D

  4. I'm so bad I won't even go into a place that sells cigarettes. I avoid that section of the grocery store like poison. They say it's harder to kick cigarettes than it is to kick heroin. I don't know a thing about that, but I know how hard it was to quit smoking.

    I was advised to smoke by a drama/singing instructor who said my voice needed more "weight" whatever the hell that means.

  5. LOL! Guess what I had for lunch? Bacon. Just bacon. My son and I cooked up half a pound and stood in the kitchen chatting and eating. I asked him if he wanted me to make him a BLT out of it and he just gave me The Look.

    So, besides bacon ~ the *bad* things I'm not giving up ~

    Loud music ~ It seems like everyone loses their hearing to some extent as they age, so who cares anyway? I'm shooting the moon here. I like music so loud and bass-y it becomes a part of me. The day I can't feel music anymore, I may as well just lay down and die. Quietly.

    High heels ~ People ask me all the time "How can you walk in those things?" and I scoff "How can you NOT?!" I've heard all about how they're going to give me bunions and back problems, but so far so good, and as long as I continue to look as hot in them as I do, it would be a crime against humanity to stop. I do it for the people.

    Intense movies a la The Texas Chainsaw Massacre ~ "That shit's gonna warp your mind." Oh yeah? Well that explains it then.

    Eschewing exercise ~ Hate it. Always have, always will. Unless it's swimming, dancing, or having sex, I have no interest making my body do it. And as long as it continues to look like I don't need it, that's the way it's going to stay.

    Indulging in the herb ~ I don't care for alcohol and I've never smoked cigarettes. This seems a logical compromise. Yeah... that's it.

    This California girl loves her sunshine, red meat (that category better include pork!), butter, diet coke, eggs, french fries, seafood, cheese, meat with melted cheese on it, Cheetos, fried cheese, and pie. See you all in hell, folks. :)

  6. Oh yeah. Melted cheese. Not giving that up. Or cheese of most any variety, really. I'm not a fan of pre-moldy cheese (bleu) or really stinky (a la gorgonzola) but otherwise, gotsta have me some cheese.
    Like every day.

  7. oooooooh...Bacon, cheese, stinky cheese....LOUD music...

  8. I am not giving up on wine, beer, butter, bacon, sour cream (that's the hungarian in me)or a good political debate with folks who have polar opposites views from mine!

  9. Beer -- Good beer. Not watery piss in a can...BEER. Dark, thick, syrupy, hoppy, kick-you-in-the-teeth beer. Now if only it didn't have alcohol, because what with multiple rounds of hardcore acne meds my liver is damn near shot. Oh, well.

    Coffee -- The only reason I can function in society. That's not blood in my veins, it's Nawlins chicory blend.

    Big Stompy Boots -- Doc Martens, Demonias, Grinders, Fluevogs, I've got 'em. I keep getting told I'm too old to wear such things (I'm 31) but then again people were telling me that when I was 20. So I figure, fuck 'em, I'm going to wear my shiny 6-inch Frankenstein buckle platform boots and be happy. And tall. :)

  10. Jackal, I'm 46 and NO ONE is taking my Docs away from me. If anyone says anything to you, invite them to come and get your footgear. Alone. In the dark. I'll give you a hand to demonstrate one of the reasons one needs such boots in an urban environment. So there.

    Oh, and they're not getting their hands on my jacket, either!

  11. Good beer is a food group all by itself. All Hail Unibroue!

  12. I'm keeping sugar in my life. And my car. I'd like to bike but it just pisses down rain here 11 months out of the year.

  13. Being on the Loss Leader Diet, I can't afford enough of anything really bad often enough to do me any harm. My dentist would probably like me to give up tea.

    I had to give up platform shoes thirty years ago because I couldn't find them any more. At least they lasted through college, and I managed perfectly well on them, regularly sliding down one little hill whenever there was ice.

    I suppose I can count hair colour. If I'd never started, I'd have had Phil Donahue hair before I was thirty.

    Sadly, on the whole, I just never really took to things that were all that bad. But I make up for it doing so many things for which people would say I'm too old.

  14. Reading mystery novels in bed till my eyes shutdown and I dream of murthermostfoul....

    "Wasting time" (how is that possible anyway? --isn't time the one that wastes us all sooner or later?), asking why to whys, perusing all the books on the shelves in the library around the one I'm actually supposed to be looking for, sideway thinking in general.... DIGRESSING!

  15. I decided to quit smoking because it was "bad" for me, and I'll believe that without argument. I decided to stay quit because every time I started again it felt like shot, and I will quit anything that makes me feel like shit.

    I will not quit drinking. Sex. Sleeping in. Bacon. Sex. Steak, pork, meat-food. Sex. Coffee. Sex.Cheese. Sex.

  16. Wait, sex is bad for you?
    Well sign me up for not giving that up either, then.

  17. hrumpole - I'm with you on the hair color. I started going gray in high school and I'm damned if I'm going to go gray now!

    kati - Where would we be without so-called "trashy novels", anyway? I've generally got two or three books going at any given time that are at varying levels of silliness. There's nothing like turning off all media and reading in silence with perhaps a glass of wine or a snack...

    Schuyler - I don't see any of those things as vices. They're....basics, aren't they?

  18. Cheese. Oh lord, cheese. I'm lactose intolerant, and I just can't give up my solid, salty, creamy dairy. I gave up milk in liquid form, cream, etc. But I can't let go of cheese. I just take the bloating when I don't have my lactose pills, or take double doses of the pills when I'm hitting the cheese. *happy sighs*

    Fried food. I don't eat it all the time, but I haven't met a food that isn't improved by a little deep frying. Dim Sum is an excellent example of this!

    Alcohol... I don't drink much, but if I want my chocolate soy milk frozen yogurt Amaretto "milkshake" for dessert one night out of 365, I'm going to do it. Same for drinks with vodka, rum or tequila in them. Wine unfortunately gives me migraines and I can't drink the beer because of the yeast, but I LOVE a good, cold, dry cider. It's as close to beer as I can get without the sick feeling!

    Sex... I consider it a life necessity, so it's not bad. Even if they found out "excessive" amounts gives you cancer, I'd still be all about it.